Greetings,
My name is Marc Paine. I am 34 years old, married with two young daughters. Beginning in 1993, I started receiving instruction in Taoist qiqong, philosophy and meditation. I practiced regularly throughout college where I also began classes in Isshinryu Karate and Aikido and was introduced to meditation in the Japanese and martial art culture and context. After
college I started an intense practice of Tomiki-ryu Aikido and taught Chinese
martial arts and Taoist meditation. In 2000 I spent a week in a Benedictine
monastery and in 2001 I spent the summer at the same monastery. I met my wife
late in 2001 and began attending Lutheran seminary in 2002. During this time,
my meditation practice (Taoist/Zen) became both more sporadic and more
influenced by Ueshiba and those Japanese Zen teachers commonly associated with
the martial arts (Takuan Soho, etc.) and Soto Zen while continuing my Aikido
practice.
After
graduating in 2006, I was ordained a Lutheran priest and worked for three years
as a parish pastor and university chaplain (commonly known as "town and
gown" ministry). My Taoist/Zen meditation all but ceased at this time.
However, in 2007 I took up long distance bicycling and began to practice seated
meditation influenced heavily by Soto Zen teaching. I began to bicycle out into
the countryside and find a nice spot in the shade to sit in meditation.
My
disillusionment with work in the church grew at the same time I finally began
to directly apprehend elements of the Dharma. I remember sitting in half-lotus
under the university's bell-tower when I, following the discipline of
"following the thought," saw clearly that one is not one's thoughts.
From that time, my seated meditation became more and more frequent, my reliance
on Zen and Stoic teaching more pronounced. I resigned my position in 2009 and
moved to Joplin, MO. My wife, a nurse, went back to work and I began to stay
home with our children. We joined an Eastern Orthodox parish in 2010. My
meditation continued to become more consistent.
On
May 22, 2011, a tornado destroyed our home. I sheltered my two daughters in the
bathtub and climbed out of the wreckage to find devastation as far as I could
see. My wife was at work at the time in the hospital in Joplin that was not
destroyed. I later described the experience of being inside the tornado as
"much like zazen," and was very grateful for my practice. By
midnight, my family was reunited, alive and well and homeless. We relocated to
Rogers, AR, where we still live now. For a month or so following the tornado, I
felt something like a block to solitary sitting, so I contacted a nearby Soto
group with which I had sat in the past and began to sit with them. This
"jump-started" my solitary sitting again and emphasized for me the
need and benefit in complementing solitary meditation with group meditation.
I
have continued my practice and with this newfound appreciation for group
sitting, started the only sitting group in Rogers in a yoga studio. Seeking
oversight and accountability for the group, I remembered having run across the
Zen Buddhist Order of Hsu Yun (with its beginnings in Honolulu, HI where my
family used to live). I contacted Koro Kaisan Miles to inquire about oversight
and was pleasantly greeted with someone whose journey from Chinese Taoism to
Japanese Soto Zen back (somewhat) to Chinese Zen was so similar to my own. I
continue my practice, sitting group, and have enjoyed correspondence with Koro
Kaisan, in whom I feel I have found very much a kindred spirit. I hope to visit
Open Gate for the Summer Sesshin, and I am confident that in this Sangha I will
find many more such kindred spirits. I'm interested in becoming a member of the
Order for many reasons, including the possibility of becoming an institutional
and/or hospice chaplain. When I'm not walking around going nowhere in
particular or sitting facing a blank wall, I am practicing martial arts,
knitting and crocheting, yo-yo-ing, doing hospice volunteer work, and writing.
Marc
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